Chapter 374: In What Way am I not Good Enough? (4)

Chapter 374: In What Way am I not Good Enough? (4)
Translator: Kingbao Editor: DarkGem
"I was always curious and wanted to ask you about who you like..." Qiao Anhao tried to appear curious, as though she was just being gossipy.
She thought that she looked relaxed, but deep inside, her heart was bleeding. She took several deep breaths inwardly, trying to control her emotions, allowing herself to seem nonchalant when saying the words that had sent her to tears multiple times. "No matter who I like, it will never be you."
Qiao Anhao appeared calm, even curling her lips upwards into a small smile before lowering her lashes to shield her hurt and sorrow. She continued to joke with ease, "Don't you know how hurtful that was? I was just being curious, but you had actually said that.... Am I that bad?"
In that instance, Lu Jinnian was even more confused. That sentence wasn’t part of any of his memories. He frowned, trying to recall what had happened five years ago, before they had grown apart.
At that time, they hadn't met for a few months and finally reunited in a gathering held by Xu Jiamu. That time, he had just heard from Xu Jiamu that he was going to marry Qiao Anhao. It had been the worst moment of his life. He felt despair closing in on him and on the second night of the gathering, he didn't speak to Qiao Anhao. He just kept drowning himself in alcohol. And at the end of the night, he dreamed that he had met her and had spoken to her.
Lu Jinnian could sense that what she was saying was from the night he was drunk. He sunk into silence for a long while before asking, "Was it five years ago on the night of Jiamu's gathering?"
"Yea," she replied faintly.
"That night, the girl I love had married someone else, so I wasn't in a good mood. I drank too much and mistook you for a hallucination..."
Hallucination... Qiao Anhao didn't know how to explain her current emotion... She could barely breath. Her grasp on the blanket tightened, but she forced herself to react normally. "So on that night, you mistook me for the girl you love? You thought that she was the one asking you, that’s why you said that?"
Lu Jinnian's lips pressed into a thin line, sadness creeping onto his face. After a long while, he explained faintly, "That sentence wasn't for the girl I love, it was for myself."
So that’s how it was.... That sentence was not meant for her, but the girl he loved wasn't her either... Qiao Anhao's happiness was soon drowned by a layer of sadness. She struggled to keep the smile on her face.
"I really thought you meant it." She paused slightly before continuing, "But the girl you love must be blessed, having you love her for such a long time."