Chapter 158

Chapter 158

“Four, Five Six...”
“A toast to...” Shen Junxin stuttered again, his hand trembling. The guard was only calmly counting meat, but why did he feel a coldness surrounding him.
“Seven, eight, nine!”
Helian Zheng grabbed a bottle of liquor and jumped onto the windowsill.
Feng Zhiwei grabbed Ning Yi and pulled him back three steps, grabbing his tea for him.
Advisor Liu and Shen Junxin opened their mouths to speak, confused by their retreat.
“Pa!”
The dish of finely cooked Dongpo Pork was down into the table.
A dish sized hole punctured the wood and nine pieces of innocent meat fell on the two hosts’ boots.
“Eight pieces.” Young Master Gu slowly announced.
“...”
Shen Junxin and Advisor Liu stared blankly. Their first reaction was fury, but when they looked at the hole through the table Young Master Gu had so easily made, they thought about the different in toughness between the wood and their skulls and they swallowed. Comforting themselves, they thought: Dijing people are all abnormal.
“Eight pieces.” Young Master Gu patiently repeated himself.
He liked to eat Dongpo Pork, but nine pieces was unforgivable.
Eight pieces... eight pieces of what?
Shen Junxin was a clever man, and he glanced at the ground and was enlightened. Tentatively, he asked: “Too much meat?”
Young Master Gu looked at him with a gaze that seemed to say: What took you so long you idiot. I only said this once to Feng Zhiwei and she immediately understood.
Feng Zhiwei looked at Young Master Gu’s gaze and smiled proudly. A single plate is nothing you fools. Whenever the Qing Ming Academy’s dining hall gave more than eight pieces of Braised Pork Belly, I was stuffed everyday and gained eight catties of fat in a single month. What a disaster! And Young Master Gu’s temperament is even growing gentler, hehe.
The unforgivable nine pieces of meat were quickly cleaned away. Shen Junxin had learned his lessons, so eight Pigeon Eggs and eight Steamed Crabs and eight Steamed Taro with Beef were served. The Wang Ba turtle from the dish ‘A Farewell to a Concubine’ had four eggs cut from another Wang Ba and attached to it, and a miraculous eight-legged turtle was served to satisfy Young Master Gu’s requirement.
But Young Master Gu did not even glance at the marvelous creation, focusing entirely on his Dongpo Pork.
Feng Zhiwei looked down at the one of a kind eight legged Wang Ba — this chef truly was brilliant, but unfortunately she had forgotten to warn them that Young Master Gu’s requirement only applied to meat.
A shocked Shen Junxin no longer dared finish his toast and simply welcomed his guests, inviting them to enjoy the meal. As they ate, he brought up the matter with Magistrate Peng — after all, although Shen Xuru had the power to remove the magistrate, if the Special Censor delivered the edict himself, it would be that much more official.
“I am just a seventh rank Special Censor, how could I punish a fifth rank Magistrate...” Feng Zhiwei replied, yawning.
Shen Junxin smiled ingratiatingly and a thick stack of paper bills were stuffed into her sleeve: “Special Censors supervise all officials. You are surely able.”
Feng Zhiwei reached into her sleeve and grabbed the stack of silver notes, her smile growing more gentle and happy: “Really? Well said, well said.”
“Yes, yes...”
Feng Zhiwei took out the silver notes and slapped them against Shen Junxin’s face, sincerely praising him: “Master Shen is so clever and witty. You will surely have a bright future.”
Shen Junxin’s face turned purple from the love taps and he could only smile awkwardly and reply: “I do not deserve your praise...”
“The way I see it, there is no need to rush.” Feng Zhiwei smiled and leaned over to whisper into Shen Junxin’s ear. “Old Peng is loved by the people. Why deal with him in such an ugly fashion? Shouldn’t you turn the people against him first? Slowly, move slowly...”
“Your honor is correct.” Shen Junxin replied with a bitter expression, “but the higher ups have an errand they need settled soon...”
“I don’t want to hear this.” Feng Zhiwei casually waved her hand. “Your Longxi’s internal affairs may not be appropriate for the ears of Dijing officials. I do not dare listen. I do not dare.”
Shen Junxin was unhappy to hear this, and after some thought he said: “It’s a small matter. My cousin summoned me a few days ago and said the Commissioner had issued some arrest warrants. Two pirates have recently fled to our city, and he asked me to take over for Magistrate Peng to search this area. If I find them, I am to report back immediately.”
Shen Junxin leaned over and whispered into Feng Zhiwei’s ear. “My cousin said that the pirates did some earthshaking things in Dijing that touched on... Imperial Family secrets, so no matter what we cannot let the matter spread and can only secretly capture them.
Pirates? Imperial Family Secrets? What Secret? That Prince Chu could not handle alcohol?
Feng Zhiwei smiled and glanced at Ning Yi; the prince had truly seen through Shen Xuru. She turned back and murmured into her tea, “En. Ah. Pirates. This I can help with.” She tilted her chin at Young Master Gu. “He is Master Yi, a Seventh Rank Weapon Bearing Imperial Guard. His Majesty has assigned him to accompany and protect the Hu Zhuo Prince as he tours the Tian Sheng Empire to understand our people. Before he accepted Imperial Office he was the pupil of Mount Wu Ji’s Qing Zhuo Sect Patriarch. You have seen his Kung Fu. He smashed skulls as easily as he smashes plates. He has cultivated a head smashing Kung Fu since his youth and needs to smash eight shells everyday; there are no shells in this world he cannot smash...”
Shen Junxin and Advisor Liu shivered at these words, and they could almost hear the cracking of their own skulls as they thought back to the plate.
Helian Zheng turned a sympathetic gaze to Young Master Gu, impressed by the man’s mental endurance and ability to ignore all of this woman’s gibberish. No matter what, he had to admire this fortitude.
At Feng Zhiwei’s words, Ning Yi coughed and spat his tea back into his cup. He looked down speechlessly at his saliva ridden tea before pushing it away; after some thought, he reached over at took Feng Zhiwei’s cup — she was too busy tricking people, she would not be able to finish it anyway.
To the side, Young Master Gu calmly smashed today’s eighth shell — the walnut’s shell...
Even though he shivered at Feng Zhiwei’s bloody words, Shen Juxin’s eyes began to gleam. He had seen Gu Nanyi’s token and knew it was authentic. The Weapon Bearing Imperial Patroller was usually a rare title normally granted only to a prince’s or vassal’s closest bodyguard. In the early days, the Chang Ning Vassal’s most expert guard had carried this title, and since this Master Yi was accompanying and protecting the important Hu Zhuo Prince, he was most assuredly a great expert.