chapter 23

I go to see Landon before he actually does the pack meeting, I need to talk to him. I rush out to him,
but he's not there, wondering where he went. I have no idea how to bring this up to him, but I need to. I
just hope he believes me. He has no reason not to. Before I get to go outside, he comes out of the
bathroom, I jump.

"There you are, I have been looking everywhere for you."

He looks at me weird. "I was in the bathroom. I didn't know that I needed to tell you where I go at all
times.

I blush a little, thinking of him with his pants off. "I need to talk to you about Jayden. He just told me
something very interesting."

"Well, he is a child and he has quite an imagination."

"I need you to have an open mind, I don't think he's imagining this because I experienced it too."

He looks at me, concerned, not really sure what I am about to say. "He told me that he gets hurt on
purpose because it's the only way that he gets to see his mother."

"What come on Lilly, how is he able to see his mother she is dead there is no way he can see her he is
making it up,"

"That's where you're wrong Jayden is a Healer when we die, we can see our dead loved ones."

"So what are you saying that he did it on purpose."

"I know that it's hard to believe, but it's true he did it on purpose to see his mother. He said that he gets
hurt all the time because he likes to visit her."



"So you're telling me that the person who is bringing the rouges in my territory is no one other than my
son."

"I know it sounds crazy, but it's true he's not bringing them in to hurt others just himself, so he can see
his mother because he thinks he can't I die

He looks pissed "but this time he almost died,"

"Yes, because the rouge scratched his heart, the only way we can die is when our heart is ripped out of
the chest and his was showing. But he was fine because I healed him, that's why I kept you away.

"You are lying I am going to ask him myself I know that this is not true he would not hurt himself."

"Please don't he trust me, he can talk to me, don't mess that up?"

He stops, turns around and looks at me, I can see the hurt in his face. "Then why can't he talk to me, I
am his father."

"Because he worries about you, he's afraid to mention his mom around you. It's something we can
work on but don't yell at him."

"I have to do this pack meeting now. I can't believe that this is my son's fault. I don't even know how to
word it."

"Just say you're uncertain by all the activities that have been happening that you encourage defense
training, so everyone will be able to defend themselves if something occurs again."

He looks so concerned" They can't find out what Jayden and you are, it could put you guys in danger.
That's why you were attracted to my pack, it was because you and Jayden are the same."



"Just make sure you act worried about what happened to Jayden and concerned about your pack and
that's why you recommend the training."

"You are still willing to help, even after the way I treated you."

"We can work on that later. let's just protect Jayden."

As I watch Landon walk out the front door to talk to his pack about all that has happened. He needs to
reassure them that they are not in any kind of danger. I think offering them training will help them feel
safe where they can protect themselves.

I think it's time to tell Landon about my past, so he knows. I don't want my past to come up and bite me
in the ass, I need to tell him everything. He deserves to know, especially if I am going to be his pack
member here. I know that I can't ever leave Jayden, ever. My connection with him is too strong to let
go. I just need to turn this pack into a safe pack to be a part of. I'm just not really sure where to start
and if Landon won't even let me.

I start to head back into Jayden's room. I see that he has been crying. I go up, and I sit down beside
him trying to reassure him "what is wrong Jayden, why are you crying?"

"I don't want to never see my mommy again, I don't know if I can promise you what you want me to do."

"Your mommy wants you to live, and you will see her someday she is always with you even if you can't
see her. I know it's hard, but we have to move on."

"Lilly, did your mommy die too?"

"I had a mommy that loved me more than anything in the world, but she also died. I think about her all
the time I want to see her, but I know there is a reason I'm still here. We don't always find the answers,
but I am thinking that the reason I am yet alive was to find you."



"Lilly, I'm scared of not seeing my mommy."

"I know I was too scared, but now that I have you I'm not scared like I was in the beginning."

"Lilly, I will try not to hurt myself on purpose anymore, but I can't promise you."

I bring him into my chest for a hug, hate knowing the pain he is feeling too well. Knowing it's not a pain
that just goes away with a snap of the finger. Hoping that I can help him ease it up eventually.

"Lilly, where is my daddy?"

"He is having a pack meeting. He should be done in a little while. Until he is done would you like to
draw with me?"

I want to distract him from all of this pain. I know it is going to take time. I just hope that I can help him
like he helped me along the way.

"Sure Lilly we can draw for a little, I will draw you a picture."

I grab some supplies, paper and pens for us to draw on. I pulled the table up beside us both and began
to draw. I can see the relief that comes over Jayden. He isn't as tense as he was before. It's almost like
he knows it's ok to just relax.

As we draw together, I see him smiling. I feel so bad that he has to feel the pain that I feel. I wouldn't
wish my pain on anyone, especially a child. I wish that I could take all his grief away. He is such a
sweet soul, I can't help but love him.

"So what are you drawing, Jayden?" I try to look over at his drawing, but he hides it from me.

"Lilly stop, don't peek, it's not done, yet I want it to be a surprise."



I smiled at him, "Ok, I will wait until you are finished, sorry that I was trying to peek."

He giggles "it's ok Lilly I forgive you."

"Good, I am glad that you forgive me."

We continue to color. I decide to draw a flower, but my flower looks more like a sun. I never really been
all that great with drawing. I am not a really crafty type of person, but at least I'm trying, I guess. I hold
my picture up to show Jayden.

"So how do you like my flower?" He looks at and lets out a giggle.

"Lilly, your flower looks like a sun, you're not very good at drawing, are you?"

"No, you got that right I am not a good drawer at all I was never really the drawing type."

"It's ok Lilly, at least you tried. Here is your picture I made for you, I hope you love it."

"I bet I will love it "as my words stop once I see what he has drawn for me. I can't believe how he did
this . It's so beautiful. He drew a picture of him and I holding hands, The landscape behind us almost
looks like the waterfall at wicked falls. I try to resist the tears that are filling my eyes, but I can't help but
get emotional.

"Oh my god Jayden, it is beautiful it is my favorite gift that anyone has ever given me, thank you."

He smiles "I am happy you like it Lilly,

"I don't like it, I love it." I walk over to him and give him a big hug.

| smiled at him, "Ok, | will wait until you are finished, sorry that | was trying to peek."
He giggles "it's ok Lilly | forgive you."
"Good, | am glad that you forgive me."

We continue to color. | decide to draw a flower, but my flower looks more like a sun. | never really been
all that great with drawing. | am not a really crafty type of person, but at least I'm trying, | guess. | hold
my picture up to show Jayden.

"SO how do you like my flower?" He looks at and lets out a giggle.

"Lilly, your flower looks like a sun, you're not very good at drawing, are you?"

"No, you got that right | am not a good drawer at all | was never really the drawing type."
"It's ok Lilly, at least you tried. Here is your picture | made for you, | hope you love it."

"| bet | will love it "as my words stop once | see what he has drawn for me. | can't believe how he did
this . It's so beautiful. He drew a picture of him and | holding hands, The landscape behind us almost
looks like the waterfall at wicked falls. | try to resist the tears that are filling my eyes, but | can't help but
get emotional.

"Oh my god Jayden, it is beautiful it is my favorite gift that anyone has ever given me, thank you."
He smiles "| am happy you like it Lilly,

"| don't like it, | love it." | walk over to him and give him a big hug.



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