chapter 61

LILLY'S POV

There is so much to figure out why would I ever want to be alone with him? I can see the compassion
in his eyes, but I don't care. I want to avoid being anywhere near him. Of course, I'm afraid to say the
wrong thing, but I need to stop being afraid. I am strong, I know I am, I have to be for all that I have
been through. I just wish that I felt that strength and maybe If I did I would be able to stand up and say
what I really want to say.

I stay silent, not being able to speak, wondering why can't I Force the words out of my mouth. As he
takes a step towards me, I take a step backwards, not wanting to be close to him. I can feel the mate
bond making me want to be close to him, but I fight it. Even though I know that he is mine, I don't want
him. There is nothing he can do to make me forgive all the wrong things that he has done to me.

I watch as he goes to speak to me, “Lilly, there's a lot that I am sorry for, but there are things that are
more important. That needs to be dealt with now, not later. Lilly, you are now the Luna of the pack. We
need to have a ceremony to make it official. I know that you probably don't want to, but our pack is in
danger, and we need to make it as strong as possible.”

Even though I prefer not to speak to him, I know I have to. He has put me through so much, but he is
right. We need to figure all this shit out. I really don't want Anyone else to get hurt. If I can help make
the pack stronger and lead them in the right direction, it would all be worth it. Then maybe even take
over as their alpha.

I can see the desperation in his face. I know he wants me to say something. I struggle with not knowing
what to say. I don't want him to think that I will just follow what he says like his little puppet. I decide I'm
not doing this for him. I'm doing this for Jayden and the pack members who need my protection. I can't
allow others to get hurt because of me. I need to put my issues aside and figure out how to move on



from here. Even though he is acting like he has forgotten all the terrible things he has done to me, I still
remember all of it in detail.

I stand up straight and make myself speak the words that I don't really want to say. “Fine, I will have
dinner with you but only to discuss what we need to do to protect the pack and that is it.”

I watch as a smile comes on his face, which makes my stomach turn. “Thank you, Lilly, I appreciate
you accepting my invitation.”

“Just know Ivan, I'm only accepting to protect the pack, not because I want to have dinner with you.”

“I know Lilly, it just shows how great of a Luna you're going to be picking your pack over. You're fear .”

“Ivan, I'm not afraid of you.”

“I'm sorry about everything, even though that doesn't erase all the wrong that I have already done.”

“What, you're fucking sorry really. eww I hate you so much I could rip your fucking face off. Let's make
one thing clear, I want nothing to do with you ever. I will agree only because I want to protect Jayden.”

“I'll be here at 7pm, thank you, Lilly.”

I watch as he walks out the door, I notice when he stops and goes to turn around. I hurry and shut the
door, not allowing him to speak another word to me. Not caring what he has to say, no words could
ever fix what he has done to me.

I'm so frustrated about how he has changed my mood. I began stomping around like a child. I become
so angry I then throw myself on to my bed. I look up to the ceiling, then begin to wonder what he has
planned for tonight. I then stopped myself. It doesn't matter what he has a plan, he is a monster. That



doesn't deserve any of my attention. Now that I officially marked him, how am I going to be able to
resist him?

I need to come up with some kind of plan. To make sure that I don't fall back into his trap. It all has to
be a game. Right, I mean come on memory, lost. It all has to be a joke. He can't be this good person
after all that he has done. No matter if I marked him, I will never fall back into this web of Ivan I refuse. I
need to be able to find my own path, but I think right now this pack needs There, Luna. So, I won't run
away, I will stay and do whatever I need to do to protect them.

I'm confused by the confidence that I feel. It is like it's not me at all. Has the mark on Ivan changed me
to make me the Luna I'm supposed to be for this pack. I almost feel like I have a purpose. Then All of a
sudden, I get a chill that goes down my spine. I shake it off as I then become worried because Right
then and there is when I realize something bad it's coming, or maybe it's already here.


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