Chapter 156: Sincerity Is Just Next to Misery (6)

Chapter 156: Sincerity Is Just Next to Misery (6)
Translator: Lonelytree Editor: Millman97
It was then that Su Zhinian realized he had said too much. He shut his mouth immediately.
His face, covered with weariness, looked at a street lamp faraway. It was after some time that he said, "You can go home."
Then, he stepped into the revolving door.
His back was straight, but Cheng Qingchong could see the loneliness that weighed down on her boss. She knew he was unhappy, and her heart wrenched with pain. Her hand that gripped the car handle unconsciously tightened.
…
Su Zhinian had no idea how long he spent sitting at his office chair before he moved his hand to press at the stomach that was rumbling with pain from too much alcohol. Then, his gaze slowly fell on the present beside him.
He lost his attention staring at the present. He unwrapped it and flipped the box open. The whole set of jewelry glittered, dazzlingly reflecting the office light. The glow was so bright that he had to look away. He slammed the box shut the next second. He stood up and walked to a cabinet in the room. He pulled one of the drawers open and dropped the present in it.
The drawer was huge and deep. It was filled with all sorts of presents. He stared at these various presents of different sizes, ages, colors, and a shade of melancholy appeared on his face.
For these past few years, whenever she needed anything, he would unconsciously have his secretary buy it. However, he was never able to gift them to her after the purchase, so he either had his secretary throw them away or he dropped them into this drawer, forgotten and unused.
He really wanted to be good to her, but he knew he couldn't.
He knew perfectly well there was no possibility between them after he found out the secret five years ago. However, in these past five years, he could not stop himself from listening in on her, following her every move, and sharing in her joy and sadness. Like a crazy man, he even applied for a secret number to message her. In fact, when he knew Song Cheng had committed suicide, he appeared at her side at the first notice and followed behind her for one whole day as she cried her heart out. When Song Empire faced financial crisis, before she found him, he had already collected all the information he could on the company.
He really shouldn't have signed that contract with her, to have her move into his house, but he desperately wanted to see her, and that was the only way he could see her on a daily basis.
He had been trying so hard to learn to give her up, but certain love would only intensify the more one wanted to get away from it.
He had been trying so hard to not be sad because of her, but sincerity was closest to misery. The realer the love, the more vulnerable one was to sadness.
He had already lost count how many times he had screamed her name inside his heart after the day wound down and he was alone with his thoughts. Every time he called her name, a fresh bloody hole appeared on his heart.
Tingting, Tingting, Tingting…
…
If not for the fact that Su Zhinian had almost violated her due under the haze of alcohol, she would have forgotten, when she first signed the contract with him, he had told her, "If I ever want you, it is solely because of convenience, after all, I've used you once before."
She understood what he meant by that. Therefore, the first few days she moved into his bungalow, she had spent her nights like there a mouse, jumping at the smallest movement. However, as the days passed and he did not touch her, she had slowly let her guard down.